American Airlines complaint: Airline assistant on board

I was on a flight from Charlotte NC and there was a delay, Then we flew to Chicago and missed our flight to Alaska. So we had to get a room in Chicago and lose hotel fee in Fairbanks and add hotel fee in Chicago. The next night we were 3 hours delayed and finally flew out on Saturday the 19 of June for Alaska. Finally can begin vacation. I’m 6’3” and have been a Police Officer for 28 years. So I know how to rescue someone in an emergency. The emergency row was empty and I ask the stewardess if i could move one row back since it was empty. She stated that is cost money for those seats, SO I GUESS THATS A NO!
So I fly over 6 hours to Alaska with the lady in front of me having her seat back and mine unable to because of the emergency exit row. And the emergency exit row was empty all the way to Fairbanks. I think I spent enough extra money to cover that seat by missing my plane. The seats we empty all the way there. Please help me understand some courtesy in this. I understand rules more than anyone. But being a Veteran and a Chief of police I could definitely helped in a emergency.
I deal with customer service everyday and for the most part it is easy. In a time where airlines are needing people to fly to get back on there feet, this is how there treated??